Love in Adoption

More words of wisdom from Dr. Ray that can be yours in the give away of Adoption: Choosing It, Living It, Loving It.

"Love is at the critical center of parenthood. Without it not much else good happens. Properly understood, love is more than critical; it is enough. The key though lies in what we understand love to be." With those words, Dr. Ray begins debunking the myth of love as just a warm fuzzy feeling. "It is that, but it is much more. It is also committment, perseverence, sacrifice and discipline."

"It is not momentary feelings, positive or negative, that are at the defining core of love. It is committment." Noting that while discipline may be love in action, it does not always feel like it, Dr. Ray gives some examples of love. "It is love to supervise closely whom your [children] associate with--for the next twelve years. It is love to scrutinize and monitor all the media seeking your [child's] attention, even if it is far more than most American parents." "[M]aking a youngster stand in the corner or go to bed early because of a tantrum" are also examples of love.

Dr. Ray points out, quite astutely, that if discipline were not motivated by love, it would be too "unpleasant" to "continue for nearly two decades." Discipline is "unpleasant"--that makes me laugh, and rings a little too true for comfort. But Dr. Ray helps you dig down into that reserve of love which is committment and sacrifice, and persevere in it, for the love of your child.

For only a $5 tax deductible donation to the House Family FSP (and an email or comment to me so I know you made that donation) you too can be entered in the give away, and get even more words of wisdom about parenting and adoption. Click here for more details.